5 February 2012, 6:11 pm
I will try to make tis as brief as possible but give you all the facts. When my son was born his father did not believe he was his. He ordered me to take a paternity test which I gladly took because I knew he was his father. After the tests came back he went to a lawyer and had custody papers drawn up giving me Sole Custody of my son. We agreed to him paying $250 per month which would increase with the cost of living every year. He was also supposed to pay half of his medical bills and any extra curicular activities. Now those were for when my son got older. The year my son turned 5 he started paying me $350 per month and that is where it has stayed for the past 11 years. When my son was 4 he was diagnosed as being ADHD, ODD and tourettes. Most of his medical bills have always been covered by my work insurance however my out of pocket expenses were $100 per month. I never asked my ex to pay for any of that. Growing up my son played soccer, hockey and baseball. His father payed for 2 seasons of hockey. I never asked him to pay anything more than that. For the past 2 years I have put out almost $15000 for his baseball as he now plays at an elite level. I never asked for a cent from his father. I bought a new truck 5 years ago now and gave him my car that was only 4 years old at the time. I did not charge him a cent for it as I wanted to make sure my son had a safe car to ride in. I have never enforced a visiting schedule. He has had open access to our son since the day he was born. We have maintained or so I thought a good relationship for the sake of our son. Last summer my son wanted to move in with his father as he turned 16. I let him go because if I forced him to stay which is in my rights to do so he would only hate me. His father is more of a buddy to him than a father who allows him to drink with him. His father does have a bit of a drinking problem however he is able to function to hold down a job. I am okay with my son living there however I do not want to relinquish my legal rights. He informed me the other day that he is taking me to court to get Sole Custody of him. In the past year my son has gotten a lot of attention from both college scouts in the states to major league scouts. Next spring he will be entered into the Major League draft and if he signs a deal his father will take that money and use it for himself. He has never had any interest in having my son live with him or having custody of him. He has however had a good relationship with him since he was born and although he spoke to him daily he never really started spending a lot of time with him till he turned 13 which was his own choice and not mine. He is also taking me to court for child support even though I have continued to pay his baseball fees, buy his school supplies and clothing. The reason I did that is because there was no way I was giving him money to sink into a bottle. I have also had nothing but good things to say about him and the fact he stepped up to the plate to take responsibility for him. All these years I could have been getting a hell of a lot more money because he makes $32 and hour and I make $17 an hour. I have never taken him to court because it was never about money for me. I wanted my son to have both of his parents. Because he is 16 I believe the courts will grant him Sole custody as my son has a say in where he wants to live. I'm okay with him living with his father if that is where he wants to be but I do not want to give up control on decisions regarding my son. Has anyone had a similar experience or knows the law to give me advice on what I should do? Thank You... Read More »
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